she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
