ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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