Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
