I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
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just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
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Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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