do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
we're so committed to being not committed
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
