I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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