i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
