Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
