dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
pop tarts are not kleenex
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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