I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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