I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
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