We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Sober January is a disaster.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
