my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
