i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
