im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
