Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Randomize
