I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
