You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
