Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
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