It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize
