Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
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