I accidentally had phone sex last night
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
