he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize