I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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