i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
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