I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
