I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Randomize
