You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
