He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
