Sponge bath it is.
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
