Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
can u get pink eye on your cock?
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize