i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Randomize
