I heard we made out
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
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