the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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