dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Randomize
