I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
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Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Ladies don't puke and tell
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
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