We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
