I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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