I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
