I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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