bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize