The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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