we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize