She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
