just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
