i permit you to call me
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
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