I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Send help, water and tortillas.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
