Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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