yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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