it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
