Don't make out with my wife yet
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
